“Everybody Run!” by Todd Seavey on SpliceToday

If Jim Webb can contemplate an independent presidential run, and we all hate the two major parties so much, why not try letting a hundred candidates bloom for a change, I ask in today’s column.

“Where Is Everybody?” by Todd Seavey on SpliceToday

With even William Kristol talking about exiting the Republican Party to form a more neoconservative one if Trump gets the nomination, who’d be left in the GOP, I ask on SpliceToday?

“All Politics Is LOL” by Todd Seavey on SpliceToday

As online life becomes more and more important, political arguments we never anticipated about that existence become more important, I write.

“Festivus vs. Its Bitter Creator” by Todd Seavey on SpliceToday

Dan O’Keefe is pissed that Rand Paul is celebrating Festivus, but Paul’s airing of grievances is closer to the spirit of Festivus than O’Keefe’s, I write.

“Elected Feel” by Todd Seavey on SpliceToday

It’s not just religion -- I fear politics will evolve into a mere expression of feelings as well, as I write in today’s column.

“The Pedants Are Revolting” by Todd Seavey on SpliceToday

The modern left-liberal will snippily decree which tiny slivers of knowledge and fact ostensibly matter and then look upon you with disdain for having the audacity to care about other slivers, I write.

“Tarantino/Cops Standoff” by Todd Seavey on SpliceToday

Tarantino is right to fear both cops and criminals, I write.

“Trump vs. Devo” by Todd Seavey on SpliceToday

Trump’s not an authentic conservative -- but he is an awful lot like the parodies of right-wingers we grew up with in the 80s, I write.

“Weakened at Bernie’s” by Todd Seavey on SpliceToday

Bernie Sanders’ chances aren’t great, but he probably deserves whatever the democratic process does to him, I write in today’s column.

“A Nine-Episode Reaction to Star Wars” by Todd Seavey on SpliceToday

I have nine political thoughts inspired by a fairly apolitical new Star Wars movie.

“Film Asks ‘Can We Take a Joke?’” by Todd Seavey on SpliceToday

The increasingly fanatical p.c. culture on campuses runs headlong into the timeless wisdom and anti-censorship attitude of stand-up comedians in a new documentary, as I write in today’s column.

“Paul, Cruz, plus Misc. Idiots” by Todd Seavey on SpliceToday

Surely, most of the debating Republicans last night could never be elected president, I write and hope.

“To the Moon, Allies!” by Todd Seavey on SpliceToday

Star Wars is fun and Trek becoming dopey, so for brainy and relevant sci-fi about things like colonizing the moon, we must look to other sources of sci-fi these days, I write.

“Fasces vs. Faggots” by Todd Seavey on SpliceToday

Trump may long for the strength of the ancient fasces, but the loose bundles, the faggots, who oppose him, should band together agains him -- by dropping out, as I write in today’s column.

“Storm and Strauss” by Todd Seavey on SpliceToday

I can’t help noticing that the Straussians once talked about hiding from the authorities and now think like the authorities, as noted in my column today.

“Laws of Economics” by Todd Seavey on SpliceToday

It’s necessary to remind people from time to time that the laws of economics aren’t decided by us or written by a legislature. They’re real, I write.

“Cr(ISIS) on Black Earth!” by Todd Seavey on SpliceToday

Maybe all the environmentalists’ claims are true, but they sure never seem too far from political claims, I observe in today’s column, with cameos by Brown alums, Bernie Sanders, and terrorists.

“Sex on Campus and in Dungeons” by Todd Seavey on SpliceToday

The left as usual seems to be pulling in two directions at once, toward explicit consent in sex and extreme ambiguity, as the porn star rape accusations and feminist agitations in the news remind us, I say in today’s column.

“Attackers and Appeasers” by Todd Seavey on SpliceToday

I begin a week of bad college political memories on Splice Today with a description of the still-relevant protestors/appeasers dynamic. I dedicate it all to Howard Dean, the weasel who tweeted that free speech is good but respect is better.

“Hamilton!” by Todd Seavey on SpliceToday

I recount a debate at the monthly libertarian Junto between Michael Malice and Tom Woods over whether Alexander Hamilton was hero or villain.

“Equally Stupid” by Todd Seavey on SpliceToday

The left can’t handle distinctions or inegalitarian-sounding conclusions, so regardless of the facts in San Bernardino, I write, their inevitable conclusion is: regulate everyone!

“The Right/Left Murder/Suicide Pact” by Todd Seavey on SpliceToday

Right and left are not so much a spectrum, pendulum, or seesaw as a murder-suicide pact, and one must learn to reject both halves, I write in today’s column.

“Rove vs. Trump: Can’t They Both Lose?” by Todd Seavey on SpliceToday

As word comes that Trump has recruited aid from Herman Cain, who fared almost as badly in 2012 as Scott Walker in the 2016 race, I am dismayed by the sideshow of evil Karl Rove assisting crazy Ben Carson, as I write in today’s column.